I haven’t been posting very much lately. Been busy entertaining a friend from the states.
Category Archive: Uncategorized
Jul
12
Jul
12
Theme Week: A Social Butterfly
It must be because I wear a suit. People often jump to the erroneous conclusion that I like to socialize. They think I’m dressed to impress someone other than me. And I very occasionally end up in the place to be seen with the people to be seen with. I don’t care less about any …
Jul
12
Clockwork Zero
Every artist should look down the barrel of a gun named failure and ask themselves: If no one ever reads or looks at any of this and I never make a cent doing it, is it still worthwhile? If the answer is no, they should pull the trigger. Just quit. If the answer is yes, …
Jul
12
Fashion Bloggers Ahead / Science Fiction Behind
This year, Toronto’s fashion bloggers are taking a starring role at L’Oreal Fashion Week. Well, I suppose that explains the recent ethics hubbub. It also explains why people kept asking me if I’m going to L’Oreal Fashion Week. I didn’t really know that it was going on. I should have but it just didn’t register …
Jul
12
A Country Wedding
I awoke at ten today. Typically, this would be very early. Today it was very late. Shalome had a plane to catch and I had a wedding to attend. The good news is that awaking two hours late made any sort of sentimental goodbye impossible. We just ran about the house swearing and grabbing things …
Jul
12
Grumpy Theme Week – Breaking Up
I guess it’s official now. I changed my MySpace Profile from Long Term Relationship to Single and I’m blogging about it. These seem like strange rubicons to cross. And it’s taken me a week to cross them. But here I am. And I feel like shit. Total shit. I didn’t expect the physical pain. It’s …
Jul
12
Grumpy Break Up Week – Tell Myself a Little Story
I can never understand things when I have to think directly about them. I can’t tackle problems by thinking that I have to do this, then that, then this. My thinking is at its best when I assign characters to my emotions or thoughts and then tell myself a little story. I break my mind …
Jul
12
Cheers Smoke Shop
Cheers on McCaul Street has got to be Toronto’s best tobbacconist. It has a better selection and is cheaper than that one at Queen and Bathurst and it’s much cheaper than the one in Yorkville. The staff are nice and knowledgeable
Jul
12
Heaven
I don’t believe in God but I’ve decided to believe in heaven. Since there’s no evidence either way, disbelieving seems like a failure of the imagination or a symptom of a grubby one. So here’s what I think it is: Everyone goes to heaven. There’s no door man, no velvet rope, no security check and …
Jul
12
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12
Jul
12
Heaven for VIPs
I really wanted to avoid talking about this Crisp kid. This fifteen year old had his video games taken away, ran away from home and was found dead in the woods. Wasn’t murdered. It appears he fell from a tree. In short, shit happens. It’s sad. So I wanted to keep quiet. I ignored the …
Jul
12
Jul
12
Winter Dress in the City
You’ve fallen flat on your ass, your iPod’s battery has frozen and you can’t feel your face. It’s winter in Canada. Subzero temperatures present many challenges –to sanity, good health and comfort – yet none is more pernicious than the one it presents to a wardrobe. There is simply no way to look good during …
Jul
12
Cromwell and Cruthers Shaving Oil
I hate oiling up my body. It’s the sort of the thing that one should have a person for. Preferably young, buxom and foreign. So, when Geekigirl gave me a plastic vial of Cromwell and Cruthers Shaving Oil, I viewed the product with some trepidation. Oil is bad enough but shaving is worse. The last …
Jul
12
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12
Green Bin
I’ve had my doubts about Toront
Jul
12
Lessons From Cats
When one is looking for life lessons, it’s best to avoid humans. People spend too much time thinking about their thoughts. Most of what’s worth learning can’t be learned from these daft creatures. But it can be learned from animals. Specifically cats. Now, I’m not exclusively a cat or a dog person, nor am I …
Jul
12
Down By Flu
The most surprising thing about sobriety is how quickly unaccustomed one grows to vomiting. There was a time when evacuating my guts through my mouth was part of both my evening and morning routine. It hardly raised an eyebrow. Alas, I’ve grown soft. Just a couple of days ago I came down with something. It …
Jul
12
Jul
12
31st Birthday
I turn 31 today. There will be no party. Not because I mind getting older. I like ageing. It means I’m still alive. And not because I think birthdays are for little children, which I do, but mainly because I dislike parties almost as much as I dislike being the centre of attention. Birthday parties …
Jul
12
Baseball
I’m a baseball fan in a hockey town. For the past five years, trying to talk baseball has been pointless. Not only were The Blue Jays fielding losing teams, those losing teams were hard to watch. About three years ago, while very few of us were paying attention, they became interesting again. This year, they’re …
Jul
12
Although Ryan Oakley began his career as a simple rake (drunk) he has since become Toronto’s most renowned flaneur (no car) and notorious dandy (overdresses). A misanthropic composer of psycho-geographical fictions (sci-fi), he is also a server of food, a tender of bar and a washer of dishes. While performing all these functions with efficiency and elegance (disdain and malice), he somehow finds the time to publicly criticize friends, strangers and cultural crap.
