Nov 08
Ron Washington’s clubhouse speech to his team before Game Seven of the World Series has been leaked. It’s just plain amazing. But who would expect anything less from Mr. Washington? He do what he do. My favorite quotes from it: “Motherfuck golf.” “He pitch ball and ball cross plate, we gonna knock the shit outta it.” “Ain’t …
Aug 12
According to unnamed sources from an opposing team (who threw the world series in 1919) in a far-fetched ESPN article that holds up to neither statistical scrutiny nor commonsense, the Blue Jays have been using a mysterious man in white to steal signs then relay them to their batters. It sounds insane. It is insane. But then we see the photographs …
May 20
I said on the twitter that I’d given up Edwin. But like most things relayed in 140 characters, that’s not the full story. I haven’t given up on him as a player. I’ve given up on defending him as a player. He just makes it too hard. Like, fuck’s sake Edwin, break me off something. …
May 08
pic nicked from here In baseball, safety is separated by ninety feet of danger. Touching the base, you are safe. The moment you lose contact with it, you are in peril. To score a run, you must navigate these ninety foot sections four times. If unsuccessful, you either get out or are stranded. If successful, you arrive back where you started. Home. …
Apr 19
A computer program has written a better sports story than a human.* But, in all fairness, the human did a really bad job of it. A really bad job. TNW says: NPR’s All Things Considered reports how writers at Gawker’s sports site Deadspin assumed that a story written on GW Sports about a baseball game had been written by …
Apr 04
Bases loaded, two out, bottom of the ninth. Blue Jays behind by one run and the clean-up hitter, Adam Lind, at the plate. He hits the first pitch he sees. Softly. To the first baseman. Game over. Blue Jays lose. Final score 4-3. This sets the blogosphere, twitterverse and talk-radio to sudden debate. Should he …
Apr 01
Opening day for Blue Jays baseball is upon us. I’ve been waiting six months for this. Nothing that happened last season matters and no one knows what will happen this season. A decent guess puts the Jays in third or fourth place in their division but no decent guess would’ve predicted that last year’s Giants …
Jan 24
As I child, I’d watch Blue Jays games with Dad. The bat cracked, the ball sent on a line into a gap for a sure double. We’d hold our breath. Devon White loped towards it. Then, somehow, he’s there. Waiting. Never seemed to speed up. Always seemed to jog. But his glove always found the …
Although Ryan Oakley began his career as a simple rake (drunk) he has since become Toronto’s most renowned flaneur (no car) and notorious dandy (overdresses). A misanthropic composer of psycho-geographical fictions (sci-fi), he is also a server of food, a tender of bar and a washer of dishes. While performing all these functions with efficiency and elegance (disdain and malice), he somehow finds the time to publicly criticize friends, strangers and cultural crap.
