YouTube – Marilyn Monroe smoking pot. And looking great while doing it. So listen up kids, smoking might be cool but smoking pot is really cool. Ask your grandparents. They’ll tell ya.
Category Archive: celebrity
Sep 30
Send Leonard Cohen Twenty Bucks!
Recently, Leonard Cohen discovered that his manager stole all his money. Now Cohen is touring to try to make some more money. Then Leonard Cohen fell down on stage. And that’s when I got worried. Leonard Cohen is an old man. A music tour is hard on someone who is in their mid-twenties and Cohen …
Jul 12
Britney Spears
I feel sorry for Britney Spears. I always have. I know some of you may be expecting me to take this approach: Spoiled bitch, real problems in the world, etc. But I just don’t feel that way. I pity this woman, always pitied this woman and saw this coming back when she was dancing around …
May 30
Sex and the . . . Oh Fuck it, Let’s Watch Beat Takeshi
If you were to look at my DVD collection, you would see a lot of Asian movies. You’d probably think that I’m a great lover of Asian cinema. But I’m not. Lacking a credit card, I can’t rent movies and, lacking a working television, I can’t just flip a switch. So, about three times a …
Feb 02
Britney Spears
I feel sorry for Britney Spears. I always have. I know some of you may be expecting me to take this approach: Spoiled bitch, real problems in the world, etc. But I just don’t feel that way. I pity this woman, always pitied this woman and saw this coming back when she was dancing around …
Jan 20
Race and Gender Have a Retard Fight
pic nicked from here Here at The Grumpy Owl, I’ve always enjoyed a good retard fight. So you can imagine how much I’ve been enjoying the democratic primaries. (The republican primaries are an asshole fight. It’s different.) And the retard fight I’ve been waiting for has finally emerged. On Oprah’s message board! Sigh. I feel …
Dec 30
Celebrity is a Virus; Is Microcelebrity the Vaccine?
The only thing I hate more than celebrities is the concept of celebrity. As far as I can tell, the whole thing is designed to sell soda pop and running shoes. It revolts me. This may be an odd thing for a waiter with a fanclub to say. If I understood myself better, I would …
Nov 04
Posh Spice Goes on Detox Diet
Posh Spice is going on a new diet for the upcoming Spice Girls tour. She’ll actually be eating. It’s not a bad idea, considering that she has the waist size of the average seven year old. Think about that for a moment. A seven year old. Why does Beckham fuck her? Like, it must be …
Oct 31
Dog the Bounty Hunter is a Racist (And a Twat)
And is anyone actually surprised? I sure wasn’t. I’ve spent some time around white folks and I can tell you something. You see that guy to your left? (Not me – the mullet headed chap.) If you ever see a white guy who looks like that — He’s either a flaming queer or a racist. …
Sep 02
Scientists: They're Evil Twits Too
Sometimes I wonder about these scientists. I really want to believe the hype about the noble search for truth and whole Einstein archetype. I do. But reality keeps interfering. Some physicist has done a study into the social web within the fictional universe of Marvel Comics. Putting aside that this is a scientific study into …
- Author (Aurora Award Shortlisted, Technicolor Ultra Mall)
- Blogger (Obviously)
- Critic (Various Places, Various Things)
- Speaker (Panels, contest judge, etc.)
- One of Toronto's 12 Most Stylish (Toronto Life)
- Futurist (The weather will be . . .)
- Husband (Over two years now.)
- Worker (Cause writing is glamour.)
- Dandy (But probably not how you mean it.)
- Contact ( ryan dot oakley at gmail dot com)
