Have you ever wondered how to get rich quick? Well, I have the answer via The Reason Foundation.
Drink.
Their recent study has discovered that “men who drink earn 10 percent more than abstainers and women drinkers earn 14 percent more than nondrinkers.“
And it’s not just because we have to work harder to afford our beloved nectar. It’s because we have more “social capital.” That is, people just like us more.
I can’t understand why our company would be preferable to that of the neo-puritan, anti-booze, anti-smoking, anti-bar-be-que sect but I have some ideas. For example; a recent study about smoking says that smokers have a higher risk of HIV.
Now let’s be frank. If you’re walking around, claiming that smoking causes AIDS, you’re probably saying a lot of crazy shit; some of it about drinking. You risk looking like a crackpot. And, unlike a drunk, you don’t even have an excuse.
No one wants to hire a crackpot. Or drink with them. (Well, they might like to drink with them. Such is the wonder of alcohol.) But they do want to hire drunks. And they want to pay them more. After all, we have a thirsty monkey to feed.
The full study is available here as a PDF
3 comments
Amie
September 25, 2006 at 4:29 am (UTC -5)
Makes sense. I drink and I’m loaded. Zing.
melly
September 25, 2006 at 1:36 pm (UTC -5)
Well, isn’t that just great!
The drinkers, not only have all the fun, but get paid more for that too!
That’s it, I’m starting to drink.
Do you think I need to notify my bosses so I can get an immediate raise?
Amie
October 6, 2006 at 1:41 pm (UTC -5)
Makes Sense. I drink and I’m loaded. Zing.